Have you ever been around someone you knew was focused completely on themselves but were acting as though they weren’t? It may be the person who nodes when you tell them about a bad day, but forgets what you said just a few seconds prior and quickly changes the subject to themselves. Or, maybe the person who wants to be near you because of something you could do to make them look good.
I would suggest that we’ve all experienced someone who was self-absorbed, self-centered, or vain. Typically, those attributes show themselves more in younger people than those who are over 50. By the time you hit that age, you’ve had most of that knocked out of you; just by living life.
While working at a church in Southern California, my boss (the Sr. Pastor), mentioned to me in his office that he thought one of the singers was ‘Plastic’. Being young and naïve, I was confused. In fact, I thought to myself, ‘Is he saying they are cheap?’ I couldn’t figure it out until another associate pastor explained to me that it means, ‘Pretty on the surface but not much going on inside’.
I will admit that I was taken back by the pastor’s comment once I learned what it meant (just a little judgmental if I don’t say so myself). Even though it wasn’t becoming of a pastor and a poor role model, later in my life I understood more of what he was saying.
There are those in this life, and even in the church, who aspire more than anything else to be famous, beautiful, or rich, that they neglect their own personal mental, emotional, and spiritual development. The sad truth is that, in America, it’s becoming an epidemic.
I recently took a break from Instagram for that very reason; most of those who are posting photos (not my family & friends) are trying to be the next ‘Instagram Star’. Some fly all over the world accumulating loads of debt just to get that selfie photo in front of a famous beach, rock, or over a cliff. Nearly every day we hear of one of these people being killed because of the risk they’re taking just to get ‘The shot’ that will go viral.
Our culture is driving us to focus so much on fame and appearances that it’s leading to an explosion of people with eating disorders, augmenting their body parts, and suffering from depression caused by a sense that they will never live up to this false image. My question is where will it all end? We must battle this ‘Plastic’ surface-focused culture with truth, humility, and by seeking out opportunities to serve others.
During my time in the Bay Area, one of the things I would do was serve in a local homeless shelter downtown in San Francisco. A local high school had a community service program that required each student to have at least 100 hours of service before they could graduate. Often, to help them get their hours in, the school would bus kids to the shelter where they would spend their Saturday serving meals to people who just came off the street. I saw many of them transformed in a short amount of time by the experience, believe me.
The first step to change is realizing we need to change. It may take a dramatic event for some to realize they are self-absorbed. Some may never realize it and live their entire life expecting others to serve them or to raise them up because they are somehow more ‘Gifted’ or beautiful.
For me, God has a way of keeping me humble. He knows, and reminds me often, when I may give myself one too many looks in the mirror, feel a little too good about myself when complimented, or just obsess about my life’s dreams. Over the years life has also humbled me (many times).
Yet, at my lowest, most humbling moments, I felt that was where I found God the most. It wasn’t my gift He wanted; it was my heart. It wasn’t money or even my ‘Not so great’ looks either (joking). God simply wanted me and, even more importantly, He wanted me to serve others.
When we’re at that place where we give everything to Him is when He will take it and give it back to us in a way we could never have expected, because that’s just what He does. When we lose our lives, for Him, we will gain life; life eternal…